Monday, August 23, 2021


 New sweater.. J Jill.. really do like that store.. they have clothes that fit and are for the more mature woman.. covers things that need to be covered, yet in a stylish manner :)

No internet all week end.... got it fixed today.. am so tired of calling Bend Broadband! and sure they are tired of me.. BUT this time it was their fault... i think.... had issues last week with TV.. and they had to reset the cable box.. happens about every other week, go to bed all is well, wake up and it does not work. ????? and this time, in unhooking and hooking back up somehow the site got reset to default... and password changed... have used the same password for lo all these years, 9.. i think and now they say this changed it and it is on the bottom of the box, no, not so, but was not going to argue with them, the code on the bottom of the box is the same as i have always used and if someone comes here and wants on my internet they use it to get on... well, no more, now it is new.  AND i just find this all confounding... just do it and hope it works and stays working, no need to know why... just DO IT!!! But am happy to have my wifi back and can play my little comp games and get messages from whomever... is nice outside, yet cold inside, and do not want to turn on heat, so am bundling up, then take things off if go outside... what a time... had nails done and they are Fall-ish.. i feel Fall-ish

Sundays are the worst, why is that.. nothing going on... and i have time to think about all that is gone and not coming back. things i can no longer do... my friend and i wanted to go to New York, on the train- from Iowa... wanted to do another beach trip to the gulf... and to see Napiers in Home Town in Mississippi... just have family time.... just that would have been enough.. many more dinners out... i have lived 7 more years than she did... she lost those years or more after... i just can't let it all go. just keep thinking and thinking.  BUT i DO think of all the things we DID get to do, it is not just what was lost, but what was done too. and my head hurts from all the crying, crying... just feel sad... and lonely, alone.... and, yes, i know that is not what she would have wanted... she wanted to leave memories and she certainly did, many, many.  Grief is a strange land... comes and goes in waves, more and less. And then you remember....

Take Care and God Bless


  1. Grief is a strange land, well said. /and, yes, she would want us to continue to LIVE, Explore and have Joy.

  2. I had a rough day yesterday also. Kept thinking about my friend who died this summer. And then of course, that led to the pups that are gone. And my heart aches. I understand the grief you feel. We're also at that age where we think about dying and some days it really doesn't sound like a bad idea. But then we get to experience the new sunrise and know the potential of a new day. Grief doesn't just go away. We learn to live with it. But some days grief wins. And that's okay because then we have the memories. Live and enjoy.